Upon the occasion of my retirement from the Army, I was happiest about not having to do any more pushups. (also called the “leaning rest” position.)  An original tune.

Well, the Army’s good to me,
I think that you’d agree,
There’s worse thing in this life that I could do.
I know that I’ve been blessed,
But I hate that leaning rest.
Now my final PT test at last is through.

(Chorus:)
I’ll do my sit-ups one by one,
Even walk the two mile run.
Smiling as I’m going out the door.
My PT days are through,
Brother, I’m a’telling you,
That I ain’t gonna do no pushups any more!

I’ve given twenty years my friend,
I thought they’d never end,
All those dark and lonely nights out in the cold.
I’m still a’plenty strong,
And it won’t be very long,
‘Fore they tell me this here soldier’s just too old.

(Chorus)