Kindle Limericks

When the Kindle was a new sensation, I started a limerick thread on the Amazon forum.  Here are my contributions:

Paper’s the way of the past
now trees we can save at last!
The Kindle is grand
for saving our land!
Get yours now and download books fast!
 
A Kindle I bought for my wife
I’m thinking it just changed her life.
Her books were so many,
I got Kindle-Envy!
We now have TWO! No more strife!!
 
In planes I fly ‘cross our land
With my trusty ol’ Kindle in hand.
I can’t hardly read!
Other passengers need
To know why this Kindle’s so grand!
 
Reading a Kindle, deployed
Could really fill a big void
You’d need a computer
To download books better
The Internet you can’t avoid.
 
I too am awake I fear
Can’t sleep so I came here
To pass away time
I’m here reading rhyme
Having a laugh and good cheer.
 
Kindlers are keeping their eyes on
Amazon’s distant horizon
Watching in vain
For solutions twain:
Folders and Kindle’s backlights on!
 
I went to the doctor today
In the waiting room I had to stay
Time went by so slow
T’was painful, you know?
I forgot my Kindle! Oy vey!
 
Did the limerick group hit a hump?
I thought it was time for a bump!
I looked high and low
Last post was ONE DAY AGO!
From page 6 to page 1 it will jump!
 
In the sun at the beach Greg was basking
Tom read to him without asking
Then Greg looked around 
Taking in sights and sounds
So while “reading” Greg’s multi-tasking!
 
I wonder how many have read
Each and every limerick thread
It took me awhile
But gave me a smile
Now limericks are filling my head!
 
I can’t read one chapter complete
My dog thinks it’s time for a treat
It just never fails,
She’s wagging her tail –
There’s six doggie toys at my feet!
 
The rhythm for lim’ricks it’s said
Is more easily heard than read
The meter is neat
When counting the beat
Soon lim’ricks are filling your head.
 
My Kindle is taking a break
The books will just have to wait
The reason is clear:
My grandkids are here!
I think we’ll go to the lake!
 
Two men argued with each other
“I don’t like e-books, my brother”
So he said in defense
“It’s just common sense –
You can’t judge a book by its cover!”
 
I overheard two people talking
One morning while I was out walking
“What’s the best thing
That Santa could bring?”
“A Kindle in my Christmas stocking!”
(Never too early to plan ahead!)
 
This forum is starting to lag
Limerick writers have hit a snag
Let’s keep it alive –
We’re at Four-Ninety-Five!
Five more! Hooray! Wave the Flag!
 
 
 
 
Thanks for your posts, “J” and Sue,
And for all limerick writers, too! 
Tho’ Sony may fight us,
Our Kindles unite us
I’m off to read something new…
 
Today I’m not feeling too good
You see I live and work at Ft. Hood
My comrades are down
Too much media in town
I’d make it all go away if I could.
(Sorry this isn’t a Kindle limerick.)
 
The pictures were too small indeed
A zoom was something we’d need
With our new Kindle app,
Reading landscape’s a snap
The pictures are now easy to read!
 
I went on a Christmas Cruise
I’ve got the Kindle Blues
Was not a good trip
Left my Kindle on ship
A new one I’ll have to choose.
 
Knowing my Kindle was lost,
tried to find it at any cost
To search and to strain
and feel all the pain
No sleep, just turned and toss’d. 
 
I called the lost and found
they said “no Kindles around”
So here’s what occurred:
I de-registered! 8-(
Now my hopes for New Kindle abound! 🙂 
 
The warranty company was great –
sympathized with me and my fate
with no Kindle to cover
their response was none other
than issue a refund without wait! $-)
(This was a refund of my warranty costs, NOT a refund of the Kindle costs!)
 
BeeCee, I appreciate thē
responses you gave to me
the moral is this
if your Kindle you miss:
Find it quick, while you’re still out at sea!
 
 
 
BeeCee! You’re all set to sail!
I wonder which ship you’ll avail?
I can be seen
On Jan seventeen
The Freedom, from Port Canave-rail!
 
 
I received my new Kindle 2
The archive worked great, it’s true:
My marks and my notes
My highlights and quotes
Were preserved and all came through!